2002-01-17 (Thursday) - 1:32 p.m.

There are few things in life as frustrating as what I felt last night.

I was talking with a friend and being my usual cynically jovial self. The conversation was good and fun but then veered into a bit more serious terrain. I didn’t change my tone and that created a disaster when I inadvertently mocked my friend.

What I thought was a bad phone connection was really just a pause on her part before I heard her again and she was unsuccessfully trying to fight back tears and keep the conversation going. She tried once but couldn’t keep things together and basically ended up saying goodbye.

All I wished for at that moments was the ability to just take away all of my friend’s pain. To some how soak it all up and deal with it myself but, as I have found out before, that is, of course, impossible.

Still I feel powerless and, for that, lousy as perhaps I should.

Maybe right now I should just be grateful that I always knew my parents wanted me.

email me if you care to,
micah

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